Voldemort's Plan
by Pantherstrike
Summary: Voldemort sing's "Be prepared" I really have too much fun writing these. One-shot.


~Okay in case you haven't noticed I've gotten a teensy weensy itty-bitty obsession with the Lion King lately. I blame ABC family for playing it so much lately. Also Elton john for making great catchy songs. Either way this is another funny cracky song-fic of Scar's "Be prepared" in the context of Harry Potter. In Bellatrix's lullaby there was so little drarry you could barely see it. _Here there isn't any._ It's just Voldy. A very Potter musical warped my vision of him. I can never think of him as scary anymore. Now he's just the misunderstood tap-dancer with a dream to sing and dance. Enjoy this fic. This is probably my last lion king song fic but if anyone can think of songs and movies and books that fit each other than I will gladly do my best.

SEX!

Now that I have your attention, can you please review and make me squee so loud the windows break? DANK WU! X3 Panther over and out~

Voldemort's Plan

~*~Malfoy Manor crackled with energy as Voldemort's rage singed the air. The boy of the prophecy had been born and no one can find him! The Potters had gone into hiding and time and time again his followers had lost their trace and failed him!

He paced and growled when he heard the voices of the followers that failed him. He listened on the alcove from above, watching them and listening to their complaints reaching his ears.

Goyle growled. "Bloody Order, I'm not going to be able to sit for a week!" Lucius began to cackle madly. "It's not funny" Lucius sounded like he couldn't breathe. Voldemort hoped he died laughing. Such a mundane way to die from such a proud man. "It's your own fault for not looking where you were going and failing into the Hungarian Rose bush of that nutty decoy house!" Goyle snarled and drew his wand "hey just shut up!" Goyle threw a hex and it bounced off a mirror nearly hexing himself.

Bellatrix screeched. "Will you knock it off!" Voldemort sighed in disappointment when he heard Goyle's childlike excuse. "Well he started it!"

Voldemort heard a dramatic swish of robes as Snape entered and was relieved that there was now an intelligent brain in the mix. The man really did have a gift for teaching underlings how to stay in line. "Look at you all." The young teacher chided. "No wonder you're disappointing our lord. Pathetic."

Bellatrix laughed. "Oh it's just you Sevy-kinns. I thought it was someone important." Crabbe laughed "yes, like Dumbledore." Voldemort flinched. He couldn't help it. He heard the members laughing and Snape's painful sigh that he always did when he was starting to get a headache. "I'm surrounded by idiots."

Snape was apparently extremely short-tempered today for Voldemort heard him snap. "I'm not sure you even deserve being in the Lord's inner circle but I shall not doubt his judgment. Though you were practically given the Potters and you couldn't even dispose of them."

Bellatrix hissed. "Well you know they weren't exactly alone." "Yeah!" Crabbe broke in. "What exactly were we supposed to do? Kill Dumbledore?"

Voldemort had heard enough. He jumped off the railing down onto the floor below startling the death eaters. "Precisely"

He circled the group choosing the first ones to intimidate. "I know that your powers of retention are as wet as a muggle's backside" He eyed Crabbe who was skirting Nagini.

"But think as you are, pay attention!" sparks fly out of his wand distracting and terrifying the man into staying still beside Goyle.

"My words are a matter of pride. It's clear from your vacant expressions" He waved a hand in front of Crabbe and Goyle's faces.

"The lights are not all on upstairs" They had the brain power to look confused.

"But we're talking kings and secessions!" he hissed and Nagini wraps around his shoulders. "Even you can't be caught unawares!" He snaps and turns on a snickering Lucius. They're all children! They'll need to be taught. Be prepared!

"So be prepared for a chance of a lifetime. Be prepared for sensational news!" They watched him as he felt a rush of power that he'll have his chance.

"A shining new era, is tiptoeing nearer!" Snape interrupted him all business as always "and where do we feature?"

"Just listen to teacher." He hissed. The teacher becomes the pupil once again. But Snape knew his place. "I know it sounds sordid, But you'll be rewarded When at last I am given my dues!" He thought of the old coot that was the light and laughed. Everything will be his!

"And injustice deliciously squared! Be prepared!" he rounded on his followers, the last word a command.

Lucius turned to instruct Crabbe. "Yes, be prepared. We shall be prepared my lord" Looking uncertain Lucius leaned over to Goyle, "be prepared for what exactly?"

"For the death of Dumbledore!" Voldemort shouted. Crabbe looks confused again. "Why? Is he sick?" At Voldemort's hissed command, Nagini wraps around Crabbe, terrifying him. "No fool we're going to kill him. And Potter too. And that foolish minister"

Goyle nods his head as Nagini lets go of Crabbe, "Yes who needs a Minister?"

Enraged Voldemort sent showers of sparks at Goyle. "Idiots! There will be no Minister but a King! I will Lord over the entire Wizarding and Muggle world! Stay will be and there will be limitless power at your feet!"

All the death eaters are drawn into the room by his shouting to hear his announcement. Bellatrix leads them in a chant of "Long live the king! Long live the king!"

They all sing as Voldemort stands once again on the balcony ruling over is growing empire. "It's great that we'll soon be connected, with a king who'll be all time adored"

Voldemort grins madly. "Of course quid pro quo you're expected to take certain duties on board" He nods to Greyback and the werewolf howled with glee of the kill.

"The future is littered with prized and though I'm the main addressee the point I must emphasize is" He hissed his pleasure and then shouted to make his point: "You won't get a Knut without me!"

"So be prepared for the coup of the century!"

"Be prepared for the murkiest scam!"

"Meticulous planning!"

"Tenacity spanning!"

"Decades of denial- Is simply why I'll"

"Be king undisputed, Respected, saluted

And seen for the wonder I am!"

"Yes, my teeth and ambitions are bared

Be prepared!"

All sing as clouds of dark magic fill the air "Yes, our teeth and ambitions are bared—

Be prepared!" The last part was a loud cascade of sound, teeming with malice and dark malevolent glee.

"My Lord!" Peter Pettigrew burst into the manor, sniveling and panting. "My lord, the Potters! They're at Godric's Hollow defenseless. It is time!"

It was Halloween night and unfortunately for Voldemort, later he shall be singing an entirely different tune.

~*~ Yes. Bad Ending I know but this wasn't has fun to write as Bellatrix's though but still—I have entirely too much fun writing these. I couldn't think of the dancing he'd do here so make it up in your minds at the end. He could be doing cartwheels and backflips for all I care or waltzing with a very disturbed Snape—oh dear Salazar. The plot bunnies—they're after me again. Got to go!


End file.
